Need to Know
Issue No. 5: Stressed Out!
Words - Sarah Cuddie & Betty Fermin

It’s not unusual to feel awkward, uncomfortable, or even ashamed when you’re going to meet with a healthcare provider. Most of us have had an experience of being judged, humiliated, or just not believed by people when we’ve been honest about our drug or alcohol use, sexual activity, diet, level of physical activity, or physical symptoms. There can be very real stigma associated with these topics, so it’s important to find healthcare providers who don’t cause you unnecessary stress when discussing them. 

This often starts with finding a provider who you feel safe speaking to. This applies to any healthcare provider that you’re working with, including your primary care provider, therapist, nurse practitioner, dentist, pharmacist, optometrist, or anyone else who is part of managing your health and well-being. Looking for a provider is something that a friend or insurance provider can help with if you are feeling overwhelmed. Things you might want to look for or ask a prospective provider about include:

• Anti-oppression policies or framework

• Experience treating trans or non-binary patients 

• Experience treating LGBTQIA+ patients

• Harm-reduction approach to substance use

• Openness to non-Western medicine or alternative therapies

• People of color on staff or a provider who shares your racial or cultural background

• Translator or interpreter availability, or languages spoken at the practice

• Physical accessibility

Once you’ve found a good provider, work with them to make the experience of accessing care less stressful. For example, you might try some of the strategies below:

• If leaving work to go to an appointment is stressful, see if you can go early in the morning, in the evening, or on a weekend. 

• Book your next appointment before you leave the clinic, so you don’t have to worry that you might forget. 

• If you can, and if it is appropriate for your health, see your provider on a regular basis so that you can get more familiar with what to expect.

• Make sure that your provider knows your correct name and pronouns, and ask if this can be added to your chart or file.

• Make a list of questions that you have for your provider before you go so that you don’t forget anything. 

• Take notes about treatments or resources that your provider recommends in your appointment, or ask them if they have any materials that you can take with you.

• Get support from a friend or family member. Maybe they can text you before the appointment with some encouraging words, pick you up when you’re finished, or keep you distracted in the waiting room.

In order to support you in finding the positive and effective strategies to help you manage your stress, having an honest relationship with your health care provider is key and can help keep your appointments low-stress. It will also make it easier for your provider to help you get the most appropriate and holistic care for your health and lifestyle. You may think your symptoms are weird or embarrassing but your provider has conversations that might seem awkward to you all the time. It’s less stressful to have an honest but awkward conversation now than to have your symptoms get worse. 

Do your best to keep it real about:

• exercise

• drinking, smoking, & other recreational drugs 

• medications including supplements

• food intake

• past surgeries

• menstrual cycle 

• dental history

• family health history 

• sexual history 

• any current pain or symptoms you’ve been going through 

As much as it’s important to make sure your provider understands you, you must also make it clear that you understand the advice your provider is giving you. Ask for clarity on any instructions that are given to you. A follow-up question to clarify a point is essential to your health so you that you can manage your health and stress accordingly.

Editor’s Note: The strategies presented in this issue of Womanly are designed to support you in managing your own stress and limit its negative effects on your health. However, sometimes we all need professional support to manage stress. We encourage you to seek support from a healthcare provider if you notice any of the following:

• difficulty completing regular daily tasks

• an increase in the number or severity of physical symptoms

• stress levels that remain high for a prolonged period of time

If at any time you have thoughts of suicide or self-harm, please seek professional support immediately by contacting your healthcare provider, visiting your local emergency room, or calling one of the hotlines listed in the front of the magazine.